A Fart Slave for Christmas
by AnUnturned

PART 1

“Hey, wake up! Wake up, it’s Christmas!”

Josh made an annoyed grunting sound and rolled over in his bed, still half-asleep. He was not feeling nearly as festive as his roommate Jen seemed to be, sporting a red Santa hat and Xmas jumper. She grabbed his duvet and yanked it off him in an attempt to get him up.

“Wake up, sleepyhead! Don’t you wanna open your presents?” He didn’t respond. She made a frown, which turned quickly into an evil grin. She positioned herself next to the bed near his face, bent over slightly, and strained.

Bbbbfffffftttt!

“Uggh, what the hell Jen! That stinks!” He yelled angrily, recoiling away from the stench. He had actually felt the vibrations against his face. Disgusting.

“Better get used to it!” She giggled, and winked at him. “Now get up, I’ll be waiting in the living room!” She laughed as she turned to leave.

“…Better get used to it? What does that mean?” He decided to ignore the comment. He glared at her as she walked away, sneaking a quick glance at her leggings-clad ass. Jen was actually pretty hot; she had a cute face, short brunette hair and a nice bubbly butt. Despite her good looks, though, Josh had no interest in dating her. She was just too gross.

His nose wrinkled as he smelt the remnants of her wake up call. “Ugh, why is she always doing stuff like this?” he wondered. From the moment he’d moved in, he could tell they were different. Whereas he was a clean freak, she was a complete slob, leaving the kitchen left a mess, dirty clothes lying around, and farting with absolutely zero embarrassment. If anything, she seemed to like seeing him react to the smell.

But for all of their differences, they actually got on pretty well. She was smart and funny, and he considered her a good friend. “Guess I should go see what she’s got planned,” he muttered to himself as he got up, rubbing sleep from his eyes and grabbing the nearest clean clothes.

A few minutes later he pushed open the door of the living room to find Jen seated in the corner, waiting for him as promised. “Merry Christmas!” she greeted him happily.

“Yeah yeah, Merry Christmas,” he yawned. He noticed a plate on the table next to her, containing what looked like the remains of a full English breakfast. “Hey, where’s my food?” He demanded jokingly.

“Oh, don’t you worry! I’ll give you something to eat later,” she smiled. “Now hurry up and start opening your presents! Trust me, you’re gonna love ‘em.”

He shook his head and turned his attention toward the tree. Jen had gone all out on the decoration; it was covered in baubles and tinsel, and there were an impressive number of presents lying beneath it considering it was just the two of them living here. It made him feel slightly guilty to see how much effort she’d gone to, seeing as he’d only bought her a few small things.

“Open that one first,” Jen pointed out a particular present. He picked up the small, light box, and tore open the wrapping. He lifted the lid inside, and pulled out… a black leather collar, with a little pink heart on the front? He took a closer look at it, puzzled. “Jen, what is this…” he started to ask. Suddenly her hand was on the back of his head. It grabbed him by the hair and pressed him face-first deep between her cheeks.

Fffffrrrrrrrrrrrrrrppppppppttttttt!

“Mmmmf!” He cried out, as an eggy stench assaulted his nose and mouth. He had smelt her gas before, but never at such close range – it was overwhelming! She released him and he fell backward, coughing and gasping for fresh air. While he was momentarily incapacitated, she bent down and picked up the collar, fastening it around his neck.

“Theeere we go! Aww, it suits you!” she looked down at him, beaming with pride.

“What the hell was that?!” He heaved, still not fully recovered from her gas attack.

“I guess you could call it your initiation!” She laughed, then turned serious. “You see Josh, all I really want for Christmas this year is a fart slave. Someone I can bury deep in my butt, force to suck up all my nasty ass-gas, and punish when they’ve been naughty. And I’ve decided it’s gonna be you!” She giggled at his dumbfounded expression. “So your presents have a bit of a theme! They’re all intended to help you adjust to your new life as my personal ass cushion. Go ahead, open another one!”

“You’re insane.” He replied, standing up and fiddling with his collar. “I’m gonna go cut this stupid thing off. If you think –”

Bzzzzzzzzt!

A powerful electric current coursed through his body, bringing him to his knees. He clawed at his neck in agony – but the pain stopped, just as suddenly as it started. His eyes turned to Jen, who was smirking and waving a small remote at him.

“Sorry, I forgot to mention! Your cute new collar is connected to this remote. If you start misbehaving, I just push this little button, and you get a nasty shock! So if I were you, I’d just do as you’re told.” Her tone was still cheerful, but it masked a subtle darkness beneath. He started to feel a little fearful.

“This has got to be a joke. I’ll just play along for now, and she’ll let me go,” he tried to reassure himself. He picked up another present, unwrapping it to reveal a small stack of documents. His heart sank as he read them more carefully.

“Ooh, that’s a good one!” Jen remarked. “Those are official papers confirming your resignation from your job, and your dropping out of college, both effective immediately. Now you can worship my ass full-time, with no other obligations! Isn’t that great?”

“Shit. She isn’t joking.” He realised gloomily. Somehow she had even gotten his signature on them. She was crazy, and this was real.

“Ok, next one! Don’t make me zap ya!” That was a legitimate threat, he knew. He reached for another present, deciding it was best to stay on her good side until he could come up with a better plan. With some trepidation, he opened his third gift – but before he even saw what it was, a nauseating smell wafted out, and he dropped it in disgust, gagging.

“Hey, don’t be so rude!” She laughed, enjoying his reaction. “Pick it up, get a closer look.”

He reached into the box and pulled out his “gift”, a soiled, fuming pair of pink underpants spotted with countless stains and skid-marks. He recognized them.

“That’s right, those are my lucky panties! I haven’t washed them in… about 3 months now, I think? And I’ve been wearing them non-stop this past week to make them real fresh, just for you. Be a good boy and take a nice, deep sniff!”

Even thinking about it made him feel sick. He took a shaky breath, and decided to try talking his way out. “Listen, Jen… let’s just talk about this, ok? You don’t really want to do this. Let’s take off this collar, and – “

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzt!

“Wrong answer!” She interrupted him with another shock, longer this time. As he convulsed on the floor, she knelt down next to him and stroked his hair. “Aww, poor baby,” she murmured. “I hate to see you suffer like this, Josh. I really don’t want to hurt you; I want to see you obey my orders like a good little slave. So let’s try this again. Pick up my panties, and sniff them.”

He did as he was told. He grabbed the filthy garment and pressed it to his nose, sniffing as long and as loud as he could. They were vile. The ungodly stench of hundreds of farts was soaked into the fabric, along with worse things. He caught a whiff of a long, brown streak that ran down the seat, and felt his stomach heave at the pure shit smell. By some miracle he was able to stop himself vomiting, but he didn’t know how much more he could take.

“That’s it. Good boy! Breathe it in, breathe it alllllll in.” She whispered in his ear, placing her hand over his so he couldn’t take it away. “This is the smell of your future, Josh. Do you like it?” He was too busy retching to reply, but apparently she wanted an answer. She grabbed his hair suddenly, and her voice turned cold. “Say, “Yes Mistress Jen, I love the smell of your ass.” Now.”

“Yes Mistress Jen, I love the smell of your ass!” He cried out pathetically. She smiled evilly and let go, returning to her seat on the couch.

“Good! Now then, back to opening your presents!”

And so he did. As long as she held the remote, the constant threat of painful electric shocks loomed over him, leaving him no choice but to obey. And with each present he opened, both his despair and his disgust grew. He received:

A matching leash to go with his new collar. She demonstrated it by yanking him across the room, holding him between her thighs and blasting him with a squeaky fart.

An innocent looking candy cane. It was not until he gave it a taste, and almost puked, that she revealed it had spent most of last night shoved up her butthole.

A new pair of panties with a hole in the seat. A tube could be sealed tightly to the hole, piping pure ass-air along the tube and out the other end into a gas mask. After a torturous 15 minutes of trying it out, he could attest to its effectiveness.

And various other gross items, including more soiled clothes, farted-on food and tools designed to make him a better ass-sniffer. At long last he set aside his last present, (his favourite hoodie, which she had vandalised by printing “Jen’s Butt-Boy” across the front) and breathed a quiet sigh of relief.

“Aww, all done?” asked Jen. “Poor baby, and you were having such a good time. But don’t worry! I’ve still got one more surprise for you. Come on, let’s go see!”

He followed her nervously out the living room. He wasn’t permitted to stand; instead, he crawled behind her with his head at ass-level. According to Jen, this was to become standard practice in the future – wherever her bum went, his face would follow.

She led him into the bathroom and stopped, causing him to bump against her cheeks and jiggle them slightly. She giggled at the sensation, before turning away in a flourish, revealing her final Christmas surprise.

“Tah-daaaaah! As you can see, I’ve made some improvements!” Josh felt his jaw slowly drop. There stood their toilet, albeit with a number of modifications. There was now a large storage compartment fitted to the bottom, with a hole under the seat. It looked like it was adjustable, so it could be raised or lowered at the user’s discretion, and there were restraints fitted so that whatever was trapped inside would be unable to escape. It didn’t take a genius to figure out what – or who – would end up in that box.

“So, what do you think?” she asked him excitedly. “I was going to wrap it for you too, but it’s kinda big for that.”

He swallowed hard, fighting back tears. “Jen, please… Don’t do this. You… you don’t want to do this.”

“But I do, Josh,” she sighed. “I’ve wanted to do this for a long time. And I know it seems scary right now, but after a few months of huffing my ass-gas, trust me… you’ll be begging for more. You’ll be a completely obedient, loyal ass-slave, and you’ll realise this is your true calling in life. These gifts are for both you and me.”

She looked into his sad eyes, and made a little “aww” noise. “Don’t worry little guy, we won’t break out this bad boy just yet. That’ll have to wait until later tonight, after I’ve had Christmas dinner. Turkey, ham, mashed potato, carrots, broccoli, sprouts… It’s going to be delicious! You’ll be eating it too, of course, just a little later, after I’ve, ah… processed it.”

He considered making a final desperate rush for the door, but she was a step ahead, clipping the leash onto his collar. She threaded it between her legs and pulled it taught, thrusting him once more into her bottom’s warm embrace.

“Now then! Let’s go back to the living room and find a nice movie to watch. Maybe we can try out some of your new toys as well! I’m still feeling pretty bloated from that big breakfast I had…”

He lost focus on what she was saying as he shuffled along behind her, lost in thoughts of what his new life was going to be like. Maybe she was right? Maybe in time, he would come to love sniffing her farts, even worshipping them. But for the foreseeable future, serving her ass was not going to be enjoyable. It was going to be torture.

Bbbbbbbbbbffffffffrrrrrrapppppppppp!

“Ahhh! Merry Christmas!”

 

PART 2

“Hey Fart-face, get in here, quick! I need you!”

Fart-face, or “Josh” as he’d prefer to be called, sighed dejectedly as he turned toward the sound of his former friend’s voice. He knew very well what she needed him for, and had no desire to obey… but then his desires were irrelevant. If Mistress Jen wanted him, he would come. Resistance was futile; that was a lesson he’d learned a long time ago. He sighed again, reflecting.

One whole year of fart slavery.

It was Christmas Day, a day usually filled with merriment, joy and goodwill. But for Josh, it was instead a painful anniversary, marking one year since his roommate Jen had forced him into becoming her slave. Naturally he had resisted her, made countless attempts to escape – at first. But she’d had plenty of time to train him, to correct all of his “misbehaviours”. Now he was just the way she wanted him, her perfect, obedient little fart slave.

“Faaaart-faaaaace! You’d better get here fast, I don’t wanna have to shock you!” Her tone was playful, but the threat was sincere. Josh gulped, tugging on the shock collar that he wore at all times, and hurried toward her voice.

He glanced to the left as he walked, past what was once his room. Jen had reasoned that he didn’t need it since he’d be sleeping with her in a Dutch oven every night, and so had turned it into a home gym, complete with a barbell, squat rack, gymnastic rings and a treadmill. She used it daily to maintain her slim, attractive body – and work up a healthy sweat. She enjoyed forcing him to sniff her sweaty pits and feet before licking them clean.

On his right he passed the bathroom, but looked away from it quickly, feeling ill. Last Christmas Jen had installed a special toilet with a compartment beneath, which he would… well, he tried not to think about it. Even after an entire year, he still hadn’t gotten used to the taste. He doubted he ever would.

He found Jen in the kitchen, at the counter peeling potatoes for Christmas dinner. She was festively dressed, with an elf hat and Xmas jumper, and a tight pair of jeans that accentuated her bubbly butt. She was humming along happily to a Christmas song playing from her phone when she heard him come in, looking back over her shoulder and frowning.

“There you are! Get over here, I’ve been holding it in for you!”

He didn’t need to ask what “it” was. He rushed over, dropping to his knees and wrapping his arms around her waist, before finally pulling himself deeply into her booty’s warm embrace.

Ffrrrrrrrrraaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrttttttttttttt

“Aaaahh, man, that was good,” She sighed, gently rubbing her ass into his face.

It was not good. It was an absolutely rotten fart, stinking fiercely of rotten meat and beans, but he set aside his disgust and breathed it in without complaint. In fact he made a point to take several deep, exaggerated sniffs, knowing she liked it when she could hear him inhaling her gas – but despite his efforts, she still wasn’t happy with him.

“You took a while getting here, slave,” she commented. “Do you realise how rude it is to keep your Mistress waiting? I may need to punish you after all…”

“S-sorry! I’m sorry Mistress, please forgive me!” He quickly reburied his face in her ass and sniffed even harder, sucking up every last particle of fart still baked into her jeans.

Her stern pout quickly melted – she couldn’t help but smile at his frantic attempts to placate her. “Haha, you’re lucky you’re so cute! Well I suppose, since it’s Christmas… I’ll let you off the hook, if you kiss my ass. Deal?”

He didn’t waste a moment’s hesitation, immediately diving in and showering every inch of her cheeks and crack with passionate kisses. He started with short, rapid smooches, then slowly began increasing the length and depth with each one, just the way she liked it. He’d become quite the expert in ass-kissing over the past year.

“Mmmm, good boy. Uh-oh! Quick, right in the middle!” She pulled her cheeks apart slightly, presenting him his target. He quickly pursed his lips and pressed them into the centre of her crack, as deep as he could get, enough to feel her backdoor pulsing softly through two layers of clothing. And just in time –

Brrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaappppppppp

– for a ripe, beefy blast. The fart tickled his lips as it blew against them before rushing to fill his mouth. The taste was truly sickening, and he swallowed quickly, trying to get it off his tongue. The feeling of her warm gas travelling down his throat was only marginally less repulsive.

“Ooh, that was a good one! Nice and airy. Was it tasty?”

“Yes, Mistress Jen, thank you,” Josh gasped, kissing her again in appreciation.

“Aww, you’re so welcome!” She beamed. “I’m still pretty gassy, so just go ahead and stay down there ‘til I’m done cooking. Then we’ll go open Christmas presents together!”

He obeyed silently, waiting patiently by her rear for further instructions and/or farts. He was understandably nervous about opening any “presents” she’d prepared; after all, that was exactly how he’d first become her slave, one year ago today.

And it looked like her gifts were following a similar theme this year, judging by the stocking he’d received this morning. Literally, it was a stocking, a dirty pair she’d worn previously. She’d stuffed it with other unwashed items of clothing – socks, bras, and of course panties – that all reeked of her B.O, and woken him up by pulling the entire biohazard over his head.

“Well, stressing about it isn’t going to help.” Josh thought to himself. “Might as well try to think positively. Maybe she’ll grant my freedom as a present? It’s not impossible, right?” It didn’t seem likely, but he had to hope. Jen made a sizeable income working from home, and had all their groceries delivered straight to the apartment, so they virtually never needed to leave. He could count on one hand the number of times he’d breathed fresh air over the past year; he couldn’t help longing for more.

Ssssssssspllllllllaaaaaaap

…especially while he was breathing in this kind of vicious stink. Jen didn’t even acknowledge him this time. She just sighed with relief and continued cooking, her ass dancing from side to side as she swayed her hips to “Jingle Bell Rock”.

“Okey-doke! Everything’s in the oven, just gotta leave it for a while.” Jen eventually announced, giving the counter a quick tidy. “Shall we go open your presents?”

Josh didn’t need much persuading to remove his face from her crack. Before she even finished her sentence he was reeling backward, and almost fell over in his haste to get to his feet. It took him a few moments to realise he was being a little too obviously enthusiastic, and he froze to look up fearfully at her, afraid she’d perceive it as an insult.

“Aww, you’re so excited to go open presents! That’s so cute, honey! Well, let’s not keep you waiting any longer!”

He breathed a silent sigh of relief as Jen took his hand and led him into the living room, feeling he had only very narrowly avoided punishment there. Although… something about her reaction had seemed a little off, though he couldn’t place what.

Just like last year, she’d gone all out on the tree, decorations and presents. It felt like they’d stepped into Santa’s Grotto; Jen always had gotten overly carried away with the “spirit of Christmas”. It used to be one of the things he found cute about her.

She led him over to the couch, where the two of them moved automatically into the positions they’d gotten so used to over time. Josh lay down in front of the seat, leaving his head face-up on the sofa cushion, which Jen promptly sat on.

“Oh, wait – you’re not gonna be able to open any presents with me on your face, are you? Haha, force of habit, I guess! Well, since you’re down there…”

Brrrrrrroooooorrrrrrrt

She stayed on top of him for another minute or so, until he’d had a chance to fully absorb the spicy, beany gas. Then she moved down the couch, allowing him to climb up and sit like a normal human being. A rare privilege.

“So! I got you all kinds of nice surprises. Some of your favourite gifts returning from last year, and some new toys I just know you’re gonna love,” she winked at him. “But I really want you to start with these two.”

She reached into the pile and pulled out two boxes, one large and rectangular, the other a small cube. He really didn’t want to open them and find out what misery they’d bring him this year, but the expectant look on Jen’s face told him he had no choice. With a weak smile, he took the bigger box from her hands and tore open the wrapping.

It appeared to be a book – heavy and leather bound, with the words “Always and Forever” printed in stylish font across the cover. He turned to the first page to discover a picture of Jen smiling up at the camera, the shot angled down to show her sitting on his face. Flicking through, he discovered dozens more pictures, all depicting various scenes of Josh’s torture.

“This is…”

“It’s a photo album!” She beamed. “I’ve been snapping pics of us all year, so we can always cherish the memories we’ve made together! Aww, you look so cute in this one!” She pointed to a close-up of Josh, his face contorted in fear and disgust as her own bare ass loomed menacingly overhead.

To Josh, these were certainly not memories he wanted to cherish. The album accurately chronicled his descent into slavery; looking through the photos from the earliest to the more recent, he could actually see himself growing physically weaker, watch the fight in his eyes diminish over time. He couldn’t believe how far he’d fallen.

“And look here, I made sure to get pictures of all the holidays we celebrated! Here’s us on Valentine’s Day…”

Josh cringed; he definitely didn’t want any reminders of that day. The two of them had shared a candlelit dinner, then watched some of her favourite rom-coms together. It might even have been a pleasant evening, if she hadn’t been farting on all his food, and facesitting him throughout all the films. Later he’d joined her for a romantic bath, during which he was plunged underwater and forced to breathe her gas through a tube to survive. Then lastly she’d gifted him some Valentine’s chocolates… or at least, they looked like chocolates. The bitter smell quickly gave away their true identity, but he’d still been forced to eat them all.

Then there was Halloween. She had pictures of them at the college costume party, to which Jen had gone dressed as a beautiful centaur, with him attached as the back of the horse. The rubber costume sealed both heat and air almost seamlessly, making her ass sweat like she was in a sauna, while her farts were trapped until he’d sniffed them to completion. By the time they returned home he was exhausted, and she’d rewarded him with some Halloween candy as a “treat”. Unfortunately, half of it had been “tricked” – i.e., shoved up her butthole – beforehand.

And there was a photo of his devastated face on April 1st… that day had been especially cruel. Jen had apologised to him, confessed she’d had a change of heart, and would be setting him free immediately. He’d practically wept with joy, thinking he was at last returning to his normal life – only for her to laugh, shove his face up her butt and fart, shouting “April Fools!”

Jen continued to happily point out more photos, ignoring Josh’s obvious misery. “And look, here we are on Thanksgiving! Man, I ate so much I thought my stomach was gonna explode…” She paused, squirming in her seat uncomfortably. “Ohh, I need to… here, give me your hand, honey.”

Leaning to one side, she grabbed his wrist and placed it beneath her ass before sitting back down and crushing it.

Bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrtttt

Warm vibrations tickled his hand. She stayed sat on it for a few seconds more, letting it soak in the aroma, before allowing him to bring it to his face and sniff. It was only then, as he inhaled the putrid scent of rotten vegetables, that he noted her strange choice of words.

“…honey? Did she just call me honey?” He was used to being called “Fart-face”, or “Slavey”, but never “Honey”. “She said it as we came in too, didn’t she? Why has she started doing that?” It was a definite improvement over her usual nicknames, he supposed, yet for some reason he found it oddly unsettling.

Josh turned another page, but this time was surprised to see no pictures. Just a simple message, in Jen’s distinctive handwriting: “For all the memories yet to come. Merry Christmas!” Flicking through, every page after this one was also blank, right to the end. Over half the album contained no photographs.

“Weird. Why is so much of it empty? Did she just overestimate how much space she’d need?”

He wondered, glancing over at her.

“Haah, good times, huh? Okay, great! That leads us nicely into your next present.” She took the book from his hands and held up the little box from earlier, shaking it with an excited grin. “You need to get up first, though. I want you on your knees while you open this one!”

He obeyed without complaint, clambering to the floor as Jen stood to look down on him. It was a little strange, but then he was used to having his head at Jen’s ass level. She handed him the second gift and he tore it open, revealing a small hinged box. Opening it, he discovered…

A …ring? He picked it up for a closer inspection. It was beautiful, polished gold with a central blue sapphire that certainly did not look cheap. It was clearly a work of extremely high quality, and furthermore, it didn’t seem to be designed to shock, bind or otherwise torture him. Why had she gifted him an ordinary ring? He looked up at her, puzzled.

“I will!”

FLASH

Josh was stunned, and even more bewildered, as a camera flash went off in his face. He blinked rapidly, trying to refocus his vision while Jen giggled and admired the picture she’d just taken.

“Hahaha, aww, sorry baby! That was pretty startling, huh? But it was such an important moment, I just had to get a photo!”

“…huh?” He mumbled. “What important moment?”

“Well duh, your proposal of course!”

He felt his blood run cold as he processed her words. “My p – proposal?! You mean…”

“That’s right! I thought long and hard about what to get you this Christmas. I mean, I already made you my fart slave last year, right, so what else could you possibly want? But then I thought, what if I could get you a lifetime of being my fart slave? An assurance, a contract that binds us together for the rest of our lives? And that’s why, for your main present this year, we’re engaged!” She waved a hand. “I say we. You and my ass, obviously.”

Josh’s mind raced as he tried to think of some way out of this hellish development. “B-b-but – ”

“Yes, butt! Exactly!” Jen laughed, pressing hers against the side of his head. “Don’t worry, I’ll handle all the preparation. I’ve already got the perfect date planned out – one year from today, December 25th!” She paused to rip a short, wet fart that echoed in his ear. “Ahhh, a Christmas wedding. It’ll be so romantic…”

It was all making sense now – the extra space in the book, her calling him “honey”, the ring… he’d even been on his knees as he’d opened it. Josh felt like he was about to cry.

“Now then, I know you must be excited! And you probably can’t wait to open the rest of your presents, right? But before anything else, I think you should celebrate by giving your new fiancée a big, sloppy kiss!”

Turning to face away from him, she started hiking down her jeans. She had some difficulty due to how tight they were, and had to shimmy them down one side at a time, inch by inch, until both cheeks suddenly popped out over the top. Her ample ass (and a subtle earthy scent) spilled out toward him, as though eager to greet his waiting face.

“Well, get stuck in!” Jen encouraged him, giving her ass a slap. “Don’t keep your wife-to-be waiting!”

“Married… to your ass…” he muttered faintly. He felt sick. A year ago, Jen had claimed that he would one day come to love her farts, and love being her slave – but that day still seemed far, far away. He didn’t want this. He desperately did not want to accept their betrothal.

But Jen had taught him well. Once again, his training kicked in, and he remembered that what he wanted was irrelevant.

Above, Jen smiled. She felt Josh’s hands pull her ass-cheeks apart, before he pushed his face into her crack and began snuffling around. She shivered, feeling his hot breath against her skin; then shuddered with pleasure as his lips made contact with his new fiancée’s “mouth”, and initiated a passionate kiss.

She couldn’t be happier with her one-time roommate’s behaviour. It had been the best 12 months of her life, and now that they were engaged, she knew that the entire rest of her life would be just as incredible.

“Merry Christmas, honey! Here’s to another great year!”

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaappppppppppppp